A fourth difference involves the concept of “smooth interpersonal relation- ships.” This is a nonconfrontational attitude and the desire not to receive or give a negative response.
International Considerations 101
One of the three primary characteristics of smooth interpersonal rela- tionships is stating an unpleasant truth or opinion in a manner that is calcu- lated to please, or broaching a potentially unpleasant situation or subject in a manner that allows the person to retreat.
In the Asian context, rebuke is handled with tact. Great concern is shown for the person’s family and their health and welfare. Personal matters may be discussed in detail first. Then the person that is being rebuked is told that they are still accepted and will be treated the same as before. Now the complaint is explained in as pleasant a way as possible and even may be padded with a little velvet to soften it.
This can look like a useless, time-wasting, indirect, and hypocritical way of handling situations. In the American context, we want efficiency and frankness. But we must remember that we are dealing on their turf and they are the ones that are really in control.
A second characteristic of smooth interpersonal relationships is the power that peers, groups, or family have in getting things that they want.
Being accepted and doing what the group wants becomes more important than the one-on-one meeting that I have set up.
A third characteristic of smooth interpersonal relationships is the use of a go-between as a mediator to help resolve difficult situations. This person uses tact and can get problems resolved for both sides without confronta- tion. This is just the opposite of what North Americans do, which can really create some problems if we are not aware of it.
Another part of smooth interpersonal relationships is telling you what they think you want to hear and not wanting to say no.
Cigarettes are sold individually on the street corner successfully because if a person buys an entire pack of cigarettes, he is unable to say no if someone asks for one. As a result people buy them one at a time on the street corners to avoid the situation.
What does “yes” really mean? If an Asian agrees to meet with you, will he show up if he says yes? He may not, for four reasons:
1. If you have only met a few times there is not much of a relationship so his obligation may not be very high.
2. Maybe he had another commitment already and didn’t want to hurt your feelings by saying no.
3. Maybe he would like to come but he is really not sure that you want him to come. Another persistent attempt needs to be made.
4. Maybe he meant that he will probably meet you more or less at that time, but he won’t promise because something might come up.
102 Chapter Seven
If you want to have someone present you must be sincere and persistent (invite several times) in your invitation!
The other thing about meetings is that the higher your status, the later you should arrive for a meeting. As you can already see, the clock does not really run meetings like it does in the United States. To be effective we need to be sensitive to this and expect it. I have set meeting times here in the States and had latecomers arrive and have had to repeat a lot of infor- mation to get the late people up to speed. This can be very frustrating and time - wasting for the others in the meeting. I have gone to the extreme of locking the door when the meeting starts and taking attendance. The meet- ing agenda is covered and the minutes are distributed. The late people are shown as absent. This gets the boss’s attention and it normally does not happen more than once. The other thing that I have seen done is to cal- culate the value of the time wasted by the latecomers not being present.
This puts the problem in terms that management can and will understand.
These techniques will work in the United States but they will not work in other cultures.
In the Asian culture there is a concept of debt that differs from the way we view it. How debt is repaid depends on the status of the lender. The high- est form of debt is called a debt of gratitude and this can never be repaid.
It is like the debt you owe your parents or for saving someone’s life. These can also enter into the business world and affect how business decisions are made.
When you are meeting in a foreign country or with people from a for- eign country there will probably be some sort of food there. You must eat some. It is part of the hospitality of their culture and they will be very offended if you refuse to eat. Even the Amish in the United States have very similar values. If you are working with the men and the ladies bring some dessert, it would be very improper for you to refuse to eat the des- sert, as well as embarrassing to the Amish men. These kinds of actions can inhibit the growth of relationships that are required to effectively manage businesses and the supply chain.
In foreign countries, one way to get things done is with money. This will work for a while but you had better have real deep pockets if you hope to continue to rely on this. Bribes are acceptable in some cultures as a way to get things done and sometimes even expected. By building an effective relationship it can become easier to get the things that are needed without the bribes.
The better way to do business is with relationships. Relationships are very important in the Asian culture and must be considered if a good supplier relationship is to be developed and maintained. The relationship
International Considerations 103
must be built on trust and respect for the individuals. You must be viewed as a friend and someone that cares about them as an individual. By build- ing good relationships, tasks will be accomplished and the needs of your business will be met. The individuals that work in the government offices in the foreign countries have a job to do and that may not be to get things done your way. By understanding the system and working with the people that are your friends, the necessary jobs can be accomplished in a timely manner. If you try to push your way through their system you will run into some very serious roadblocks that will cost you unnecessary time and money. Again, remember the importance of relationships.